What does it take to actually be a Parent? - Blog 1 on Conscious Parenting.

It was 10:30 a.m. and her wait was getting intenser minute by minute. Just then, the doorbell rang and this little girl ran to grab her package.

Oh! How do I express the excitement in those gleaming eyes, to unwrap the long awaited paint-brushes. I could resonate with her fondness for colours and art.

“Hey Dad! When will you arrive? I have to show you something”, she made a call just to make sure he was reaching on time. 

While this 12 year old was visualising her father painting her world with laughter and happiness, the dad on the other side came home with an interrogation mark,

”What is this piece of crap? How dare you buy these paint brushes without my permission?”

The girl was taken aback, “But you too choose things that interest you, right!” she said. 

With no second thought he snatched away the pack and threw it out of the window, as he was unable to handle an opinionated daughter. 

Her cheeks were flooded with tears of anger, shame, anguish and agitation.  

So, my question is: 

What lesson will this girl learn from this episode? How do you think this will impact her life and personality?

Now, let's think about the day we chose to be parents. Was it for a day like this that we chose parenthood? 

To be a parent is a divine gift, which comes with the responsibility to nurture a little being. 

But in this process of being the best as parents, we set real high standards for our kids too. 

We- as parents- even start to consider these kids our property, and rightfully consider ourselves authorised to take firm decisions for them. 

But what is it that we overlook while making all the decisions?

Come, let’s learn Conscious Parenting…

Creating a safe environment: 

Many times in order to do our best, we tend to over-do things. For example, continuously reminding them to study and not play piano. For a second, just imagine if you are being poked all the time! You would want to run away right? It is completely understood that kids need to study well. But instead of giving forceful instructions, help them understand with a warm and loving conversation.

Are we investing right?

“You have the best life”… “You are lucky enough to have parents like us!”… 

I have heard many parents saying such things to their kids. 

Luxuries, the best education, gadgets, fancy clothes and the list goes on. 

Is that all we need to invest? 

What about the quality time? Good parenting requires that you give your children time. Take out some time with your kids, take them to nature walk, listen to them so you can understand them better. Tap into their imaginary world where you explore the inner strengths of your child.

Practising patience: 

How many of us were spanked during our childhood days? 

I guess most of us. But let's just go back once and feel that emotion again. Do you see events where you were spanked for nothing? YES!!! 

It is so sad that our society is conditioned in a way where hitting a child is normal. 

Such kids, when grown up, struggle a lot with relationships. They may succeed professionally but somewhere deep down, they will either become self obsessed or emotionally dependent looking out for approvals and validations of others. And more than that they might create havoc in their own life later as a parent. 

So, before you react, take a moment, and choose to respond to their actions. You can be firm with your words but avoid hitting a child, as it causes a lifelong impact.

Being a parent comes with a whole lot of responsibilities and we all try to provide the best of everything to our little ones. 

All we need is a mindful check on our emotions. We must choose to respond and not react. We must choose to listen and not shrug off. 

And as we embark on this journey of conscious parenting, let's learn and grow together as parents. 

Stay tuned with us. 

Live life, laugh more and try being a child with your little one.

Love and light. 

Author: Charu Rajpal | Editor: Taahira Kisna | Publisher: Kosha Life